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review common scenarios you typically respond defensively to and come up with an alternative response | |
Pause to count to five before responding | Create new automated response of a neutral statement, such as "I'll take that into consideration" or "let me think more on that." |
changing | hab it changing |
Teach the adult to take a moment and pause before responding. Implementing this pause will interrupt the behavior and prevent them from continuing the previous habit. | The adult should then self monitor to see how many times they continue to respond defensively verus how many times they implement the new goal oriented behavior of responding by listening and taking in the advice or suggestion. |
pause before respond | have a list of responses, list of ways to end conversation |
The adult can listen to and hold from responding by counting down in head prior to responding. The adult can state how hes/he appreciates the other's concern and states using I statements | |
Take 3 deep breaths before verbally responding to suggestions or hints of problems. | Introduce a reinforcement schedule for the interruption response. |
pause after a suggestion is given and think | pausing |
Rephrasing it into a question to get the adult’s input. | |
Ask the parents to report in writing. | First speak with a colleague about the problem before responding to the parent. |
Take phone call in a different location with a visual prompt to pause, breathe, listen. | used a brief, structured delay before responding. |
say hold on one minute please | say i hear what you r saying but let's talk aobut that later in perosn |
Novekty | Response rates |
Parent could ask questions to coax the client into talking about the issue | Self management- the client could track how often they respond defensively |
Pause | |
Ask a question instead of responding defensively | Based on the answer to the question, redirect the conversation to other topics |
Parent states don’t get upset I want to discuss | Provide reinforcer for absence of behaviour |
Have the adult clearly state that they just want the parent to listen at that time. They will ask for suggestions whenever ready, | Once the parent listens, take a breath and as for suggestions. |
use a predetermined statement to respond | unsure |
count to three before responding | teaching a walk away strategy |
Talk about things they like | Listen to the complete sentence then asking follow-up questions to better able to understand. |
Rephrase conversation positively, engage and highlight positives | Provide positive feedback |
use visual stimuli to cue | utilizing scripted phrases |
Try saying thank you for your suggestion. | Positive self talk when name appears on caller id. |
Do not get defensive. | actively listening |
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